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Cold
silences. Angry outbursts. Heart wrenching dread that he (or she) is
cheating on you. Suddenly everything starts going wrong, and a
relationship that seemed so promising is suddenly on the brink of
disaster. You can’t imagine how things could break down so rapidly.
This problem is called “fear of intimacy.” It’s not uncommon, but
it is very hard to overcome unless you recognize the problem and act
quickly to get help. If you have found yourself experiencing this
stressful relationship pattern over and over again, chances are very
high that you struggle with intimacy issues.
If you have developed a fear of intimacy, you are not alone. There is
help for your problem, if you are willing to do the hard work necessary
to conquer it and develop meaningful, lasting relationships that will be
enjoyable and rewarding.
Some people have bad relationships with the primary adults in their
lives, such as their parents or grandparents. Many of these adults
struggled themselves with intimacy problems or with alcoholism or drug
dependency. These adults had difficulty caring for and relating to their
children, a problem that they passed on to the children.
Other persons who have trouble with becoming close to another person
became involved in a bad relationship. If you were a victim of abuse, or
if your previous partner cheated on you, you may find that it’s almost
impossible to trust someone else again. Trusting another person after
you’ve been let down or abandoned is extremely hard.
Many people have trouble admitting to themselves or to others that they
do have trouble trusting in a relationship. Often, they cannot even say
why they have trouble. There may be no single incident or bad
relationship to which they can point and say, “This is when I stopped
trusting in other people.” All they know is that relationships don’t
seem to last for more than a few months, and they don’t know what to
do to fix the problem.
If you are one of these people, or if you know someone who does have a
fear of intimacy, there is hope. The first, and one of the most
important steps, is recognizing that you have trust issues and deciding
that you want things to get better. Only after you are ready to seek
healing can you find a way to cope with and overcome the painful
emotions within.
Some people settle for seeing a counselor or therapist and talking about
their problems. They spend thousands of dollars discussing the issues
and hoping that someone will figure out why the problem began and find a
way to help them solve it. Others try group therapy, hoping to find some
help in talking to other people who are experiencing the same struggles.
Neither of these are very effective, and people often become discouraged
by the fact that things just don’t seem to improve.
There is hope, though. Through the use of a therapy approach called Ericksonian
Hypnosis, a client can learn to relax and trust other people. Many
people are very resistant to the direct suggestions offered by
traditional hypnotherapy methods. Ericksonian Hypnotherapy avoids this
pitfall so that suggestions reach the unconscious mind without provoking
the conscious mind to put up a wall of resistance. This approach is
different from, but very often as effective as Neuro-Linguistic
Programming (NLP), another approach that targets the root of the
problem, which is located in the client’s unconscious mind.
Both Ericksonian Hypnosis and NLP techniques can help a person to relax
and learn to trust again. Recently, programs using these techniques have
become available on CDs and DVDs. This makes it possible for anyone to
use these approaches in the comfort and emotional safety of their own
home. Best of all, they can avoid the expense of repeated weekly trips
to a practitioner, and these taped sessions can be just as effective as
one-on-one sessions with an NLP or Hypnosis expert. In some cases, they
are even more effective.
This solution is perfect for those who have already experienced enough
loss in their lives. No one wants to lose yet another relationship, or
find it impossible to relate to the person who matters most to them. If
you’re ready to find out more about how you can overcome the fear that
you can no longer trust the person who matters most to you, it’s time
to find out more about these approaches. Don’t miss out on help that
is so easily available – and so effective!
Alan B. Densky, CH
is an NGH Certified Hypnotherapist and NLP Practitioner who is a pioneer
the hypnotherapy field. He started his practice in February of 1978.
He is the developer of the
Neuro-VISION Hypnosis technology, which received a US Patent. He also
offers NLP
and Ericksonian Hypnosis MP3s which effectively eliminate a broad
range of symptoms.
Visit both the Neuro-VISION
Video Hypnosis site, and the Best
Hypnosis Downloads Hypnotherapy site to download a FREE Hypnotic
Power Relaxation Program, or subscribe to one or more of the world-class
hypnosis newsletters.
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re-printed. All Rights Reserved. However . . .
Unique
"spun" versions of my hypnosis articles are available
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byline and the links back to Neuro-VISION
are kept intact. |